


in your lungs (you make dying sound less fun)

by iwillwalk500miles



Series: and the lights will flicker (as the days go quicker) [1]
Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Bella and Edward brotp, Bisexual Bella Swan, F/F, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Femslash, Fluff and Angst, Girls Kissing, Jessica Stanley is a good friend, Love, Love Confessions, Oblivious Bella Swan, Out of Character Bella Swan, POV Third Person Limited, Romance, Shifters, Slow Burn, Useless Lesbians, Vampires, Werewolves, angela is confused but supportive, bella swan is super sad, edward is emo, esme is the mom that bella didn't know she needed, jessica ships bella and rosalie so hard, or in this case (1) useless lesbian and (1) disaster bi, rosalie hale is super mad, rosalie is scary, seriously tho this bella is an angsty teen, she's never had a childhood, surprisingly smooth Bella Swan, together they are... 'super smad!', why is rosalie hale looking at her like that?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-05-13
Packaged: 2020-02-26 01:28:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18713740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iwillwalk500miles/pseuds/iwillwalk500miles
Summary: Bella loves her mother, her mother is getting married.Obviously the most logical thing to do is move in with a father she barely knows, in a town she hates, in a place she will never be happy--It's the absolute best course of action.(The friends she makes in Forks tell her otherwise.)---Oh.Rosalie Hale is staring.Their eyes meet, and it's like the entire universe has halted, the world as stopped spinning, the sands of time have stopped falling-- It's like that moment in your life where you see something that you just know you'll be good at, or a person you know you'll never be able to take your eyes off of, someone or something you'll always notice-- Except it's worse somehow, so much worse because just looking at this girl makes Bella feel amazing, like some sort of creep who got off just looking at a beautiful girl--Rosalie Hale is staring.Oh.





	in your lungs (you make dying sound less fun)

**Author's Note:**

> honestly tho this ship just sort of crept up on me

Her mother forgot to pay the gas bill.

Cold seeps into her bed slowly, ensuring anything Bella may do prevents her from becoming warm. Her feet feel clammy in her socks, but if she takes them off she will only get colder, her arm aches from it's position wrapped around her knees, but if she moves it she will only get colder.

_She lives in Phoenix why is it so cold?_

Rare rain clouds and thunder strikes in the sky.

Large crackles and the pitter patter of rain remind her of Forks, so does the _cold_ and  _despondency_  and  _seclusion_ \--

She will take a bus and pay the gas bill in the morning.

Bella Swan shifts her blankets around, she doesn't want to live with her father, doesn't want to go back. Something crawls it's way up her stomach and settles on her chest when she realizes her mother will be smiling when Bella is sobbing.

She turns to her side, and attempts to sleep. (She did not succeed.)

The next week passed her in a blur-- her days passed as they always did, her going grocery shopping, making sure the bills were paid a month in advance (just in case her mother forgot), and cleaning the mess around the house. The only thing that was different was the added packing Bella had to do, and the lists she made so her mother (all though Bella had a feeling Phil was the one who'd end up doing everything) would know who to talk to and where to go to run her errands.

"Honestly Bella I've survived without you." Her mother said teasingly, her auburn hair flicking up and around in the humid environment.

She controlled the urge to snap something rude.

"Just in case mom," She said instead, "I just worry sometimes, this will help my peace of mind."

Her mother flushed slightly, making Bella wonder if she'd said the wrong thing.

 

\---

 

"Hey Bells." His voice is gruffer than she remembers, stubble prickly looking. Briefly, she wonders if he grooms his mustache, because the thing is _glorious_.

"Hello Dad," Her voice is raspy where his is gravely, complementary. "I like your mustache." She doesn't know what else to say to him, but she kinda likes the way his cheeks flush, uneven and all splotchy looking-- like her.

"Thanks kiddo." She thinks that even though she does not know him, she might find herself wanting too.

Although the ride from the airport to her father's home is awkward and stilted, she finds herself connecting to him in a way she never has before. 

Finally, she's not the only one who doesn't know what to say.

The house that Charlie pulls up to is one that she recognizes, and a slight cringe forms on her face when she notices the state of the windows. She would have to clean that-- and that-- and that--  _oh_ definitely _that--_

She doesn't notice the red truck in the driveway until her father coughs out an awkward sound that kind of sounds like her name.

"Oh- wait is that _mine_?!" She remembered Charlie bring up the fact that he was considering helping her find a car but she hadn't expected him to actually go out and _buy_ her a vehicle.

"Erm... Do you like it-?" His face is pink, and his hands twitch towards his seat-belt like he's debating running out the car.

"Are you kidding?" She turns to him, stars in her eyes and smile so bright, "More than anything!"

When she gives him a hug, Bella is thankful he doesn't have a stroke.

 

\---

 

"I hate this." She whispers to herself in the school parking lot, "I _hate_ this."

The thing she feels so passionate for being the very place she's forced to spend time for the next two years.

High School will _never_ be something she enjoys.

Even though she wears her hoodie and covers her face she can still count the multitude of eyes that stay fixated on every move she makes, every stumble, every flush-- categorized in their cruel teenage minds for later.

She forced herself to relax, her shoulders drooping slightly and fingers splaying outwards as she tried to calm her racing heart. She just needed to get through this day, one class at a time.

"Hi!" A teenage boy's overly cheerful voice interrupted her musings.

Reluctantly, she brought her eyes upward to meet his- almond shaped and brown. "Hello."

"My name is Eric Yorkie, you're Isabella Swan, right?" His excited grin immediately put her on edge.

"Bella." She corrected automatically, "Nice to meet you." She tried not to pay attention to the cowlick in his dark hair.

"I run the newspaper, we don't get a whole lot of new students, would you be willing to be in a feature?"

Bella smiled at him, "No."

She looked down at her schedule and tried to find her first class, she hoped Eric would take the hint and leave her alone. Unfortunately for Bella, teenage boys tended to be dense.

"Oh alright, what class do you have? I can show you the way." He rambled on, jumping to follow her.

She debated it for a moment, allowing this kid to walk her to class may make him think it was alright to talk to her. Bella winced at the thought, she was being a little cruel. "Sure." She sighed, "Do you know where this classroom is?" She showed him her schedule.

His eyes lit up, and he gestured for her to follow.

Bella hoped she wouldn't regret her decision.

 

\---

 

"Does lunch always look this--" Bella thought for a moment, "--terrible?" 

Eric snorted, "You'll get used to it, I brought a bagged lunch-- you can have my apple if you want it."

Bella said her thanks, smiling softly at the shorter boy. Eric, once you get past his overly excitable and slightly noisy nature, wasn't that bad, she hoped he'd remain that way throughout the rest of her high school career.

He lead her to a table near the front of the cafeteria, where two girls and another boy were sitting.

"Hello friends? Isn't this just a lovely afternoon?" Eric greeted, slipping in the seat next to a baby faced boy and gesturing for Bella to join him. She wordlessly obliged ignoring the way the blonde teen eyed her curiously.

"It's raining." A short girl with super curly black hair deadpanned. "It's _raining_ Eric."

The boy in question shrugged off her complaints and patted Bella on the shoulder (she did not like the way his hand felt on her body), "This is Bella Swan-- Bella that's Jessica, Angela, and this is Mike."

Bella shrugged off Eric's hand, "Hi." She mumbled, "It's nice to meet you."

Jessica, the girl with curly hair, grinned widely at her. "Hey! I'm Jessica, I think I have you for Spanish!" Everything about the girl screamed exclamation point, making Bella slightly uncomfortable. 

She waved, a hesitant smile on her pale pink lips, "Yup--" Scrambling for something to say, "--Are you any good at it? I may need a little help with pronunciation." The cheerful expression she received in return to her question meant she said the right thing.

"I'm Angela." The other girl said, her voice was softer, more controlled than Jessica's. "We have Math and English together."

Bella's smile slowly turned more genuine, "Want to pair up for that English project? I already read most of the books on the reading list so we can have fun putting together a little presentation."

Angela, suddenly a little flustered, nodded her agreement and shoveled a bit of food into her mouth.

Mike, the boy with no awareness was still staring at her, a blush framing his cheeks and ears.

Bella rocked in her chair uncomfortably, "Can I have your apple, Eric?"

The boy in question, noticing her tensed shoulders, nodded rapidly-- handing her a deep red apple and elbowing Mike in the ribs discreetly.

She thanked him quietly, half-heartedly listening to what Jessica was talking about them. 

"Bella?" Jessica asked.

"Hmm?"

"I asked what you thought of the Cullens?"

"Who?" When no one responds, she continues, "Are they like, a band or something?" Bella asked, taking another bite of her apple.

Everyone gaped at her, she felt her ears flush slightly. "So what you're saying is, they  _aren't_  a band?"

"No--" Jessica said while Mike choked on his pizza, "--the _Cullens_."

"Um, a TV show, then?"

Jessica looked like she was about to faint.

"Give her a break Jess," interrupted Angela, sipping her carton of milk, "She's new."

"Why is my 'new-ness' being brought into the conversation?" Bella asked curious.

Jessica, grinned, " _Babe_ , if you haven't noticed the Cullen family-- you are the literal god of un-observation, honestly."

She found herself rolling her eyes, "Well _darling_ , if somebody cared to tell me _who_ exactly we are talking about--"

Jessica threw her head back dramatically, batting her eyelashes sarcastically, "Behold-- the Cullen family, rumored heirs of the iron throne."

"Game of Thrones! Oh I loved those books-" Bella started, only for Jessica to sigh and take hold of her face-- turning it in the direction of a group of teenagers.

"Once you've basked in their collective hotness, we'll have words about _watching_ Game of Thrones, none of this  _book reading_ nonsense." 

"'kay." Bella mumbled, her squished cheeks making her a words muffled.

_Oh._

Five perfect proportioned teenagers sat together, looking like some Hollywood movie cast.

The first one, a short young looking girl, had crazily mussed ebony hair cut short to her chin and framed her face-- almond shape of her eyes made her pause-- they were golden. Bella was reminded of a fairy, delicate features and grace in each movement and gesture-- she was convinced the girl would sprout sugar thin wings and fly off, a trail of pixie dust the only thing reminding anyone of her presence. The girl was wrapped in the arms of a boy with curly honey blonde hair, the paleness of his skin making her nose wrinkle. His face was stern, his posture rigid and attentive, perhaps he had gone to military school. His eyes were golden. Next to him, leaning on massive forearms, was a large bear of a boy. His dark skin contrasted the rest of his siblings, as did his large smile and booming laugh. His muscles strained against his sweater, making Bella feel sorry for whoever came across him-- he, too, had golden eyes.

In her opinion, the two most beautiful teenagers, where the long and lanky boy with the reddish brown hair and the supermodel girl with the perfectly curled blonde hair.

The blonde girl attracted her more than the red-headed boy though.

Beautiful-- tall, sporty, completely out of her league, Bella fell in love with a single glance.

_Oh._

She reminded herself to have a talk with Charlie regarding her sexuality, hopefully things would go well.

Bella turned back to her new friends, who were watching her with curiosity.

"Are they narcs?"

Eric was the first one to burst out laughing.

 

\---

 

Biology could have gone a little better.

Correction, Biology could have gone a _lot_ better.

"Mr. Banner?" She approached her teacher after Edward Cullen had sped out of the class. "Edward makes me feel unsafe, can I change seats with someone?"

Her biology teacher, happy to make Edward look bad in some way, was excited to oblige.

Later, when she was turning in all of the slips she had to have teachers sign, she was met with a most peculiar sight.

"There has to be something free-" His voice was melodic, musical, "Please." His face seemed to change from desperate to alluring in a flash.

Bella cleared her throat. Edward stiffened, "Never mind, I see now that it is impossible, thank you."

As he passed her, she coughed out, "You're welcome."

Before he could respond she surged forward, smiling gently at Mrs. Cope.

"Hello, I'm here to turn in the slips I received in the morning?"

Edward Cullen didn't come back to class for an entire week.

 

\---

 

"Do you think vampires can survive off of coconut juice?" Eric asks, Bella grabs a napkin and wipes the red tomato sauce off of his face. He had rapidly become a good friend, as had Jessica and Angela (Mike was still a little too wide-eyed to hold a real conversation with her).

"I dunno." Bella hummed, returning to her homemade spaghetti. Lunch often started like this, Eric asking something entirely too far-fetched for anyone to keep up with, Bella indulging him, Angela voicing her opinion, Mike debating with Eric and an unwilling Angela, then Jessica changing the subject when it got too weird. "They use coconut water as a substitute for blood transfusions sometimes, right?"

Eric nodded his head, talking through a mouthful of pizza.

" _Sometimes_ \--" Angela interjected, not looking up from the project that she and Bella were working on, "It's for emergencies only, it isn't an ideal replacement."

"Still-" Mike spoke up this time, "Do you think vampires can survive off of it?"

"Nah." Bella said, finishing her food and cracking open one of her books, "Angela said it was for emergencies, so hypothetically, a vampire may be able to ingest it-- but since it lacks any real white or red blood cells it _probably_ wouldn't do them any good."

"That's insightful--" Eric said, "Do you think vampires could survive off of the blood from the menstrual cycle?"

"So that dance in two weeks," Jessica interrupted with wide eyes, "Anyone going?"

"It's girls choice right?" Angela questioned, also wanting a change in topic.

Jessica nodded excitedly, directing her question to both of the other girls. "Are you going to ask anyone?"

Bella and Angela exchanged a look.

"Hey Ang want to go with me?"

"Sure, what color should I wear?"

"Dunno, green looks nice on you." She said halfheartedly.

"Jessica what color should I wear?"

"The opposite of what Bella recommends."

Bella faked a hurt look, placing her hand over her heart, "That was _mean_ , I revoke my invitation, and my friendship."

"I revoke my acceptance, and you have to wait three to five business days to revoke friendship."

Bella pauses, "Want to go to a Port Angeles bookstore instead?"

Angela hums thoughtfully, "Better head to Seattle, the port doesn't really have a great selection."

"Alrighty." Bella says and returns to her book.

"Sorry Jess," Angela says sadly, "Bella and I have plans."

The curly haired girl pouted. "Why do you two love to hurt me?"

Bella laughed, ignoring the two teenage girls when they started to bicker. Mike and Eric, who were ignoring the talk of the dance, took the moment to return to the past subject-- vampires.

It's entirely a coincidence that she glances towards the Cullen table.

_Oh._

_Rosalie Hale is staring._

_Their eyes meet, and it's like the entire universe has halted, the world as stopped spinning, the sands of time have stopped falling-- It's like that moment in your life where you see something that you just know you'll be good at, or a person you know you'll never be able to take your eyes off of, someone or something you'll always notice-- Except it's worse somehow, so much worse because just looking at this girl makes Bella feel amazing, like some sort of creep who got off just looking at a beautiful girl--_

_Rosalie Hale is staring._

_Oh._

Bella feels blood start to creep up her neck, and returns to her book. She wondered if Charlie would take her liking girls and boys well.

 

\---

 

"I wanted to apologize." A smooth melodious voice interrupted her reading.

She barely glances upward, what Edward Cullen was doing talking to her at her new desk in the back of the class escaped her. Bella supposed she'd have to get this over with. "Don't worry about." She says, turning the page of her book (Angela had recommended a book by John Green, she'd have to ask about more books later.)

"'Turtles all the way down'?" He spoke slowly, "Do you like that one?"

Startled, Bella glanced upward, meeting the warm amber of his eyes. She noticed that he had very light freckles and his bronze hair seemed to defy gravity. 

"Yes." Bella said, "I can relate to the main character a little--"

"Why is that?" He asked quickly, making her raise an eyebrow. A part of her wants to tell him to stuff it, but one look in his eyes reveals something familiar.

"Read the book." She decides to say instead, returning to her page, "We can talk about it after."

The lonesomeness in Edward Cullen's eyes dims, and something resembling curiosity seeps into his iris', slowly replacing a look that Bella is most friendly with. It makes the small smile on her face feel a bit more genuine.

When she walks into class the next day, she sees Edward's nose buried in a book. Bella's eyes flicker to the cover, and the ghost of a grin suddenly frames her face.

After about a week of discussing the book with the redheaded boy, Jessica (noticing her rapt discussions with him) decides to interrogate her. She leads her to the lunch table with an excitable expression, Bella notices she's practically vibrating.

"Okay, why are you--"

"So Edward Cullen?" Jess interrupts her the moment she starts talking.

It takes Bella a moment to comprehend the words that come out of her friends mouth. "Pardon?" She really has no idea what Jessica is asking; and at this point she's too afraid to ask.

"Well Ben told Lauren who told Mike who told me that you two seemed to be getting--" She paused for dramatic effect, wiggling her eyebrows. " _Friendly_."

She stills for a moment, stopping just before they reach the place she had affectionately dubbed 'their table.' If Bella was being quite honest, she had no idea what Jessica was referring too, but could tell by the wiggle of her eyebrows that it was something she should definitely watch out for. 

Playing coy seemed a good idea, but what if Jessica took her actions the wrong way? Bella decided to be honest.

"I have no clue why you're doing that with your face." She spoke as matter of fact, moving to sit down in one of the pale blue plastic cafeteria chairs.

Wordlessly, Eric handed her a red apple, which she took with thanks. Ever since her first day at Forks High when he offered her an apple, he had brought it upon himself to bring her one for lunch every day.

" _Um_ \--" Jessica plopped down next to Angela, who rolled her eyes, " _Maybe_ it's because you've been talking to one of the hottest boys in school?"

Mike, who Bella wasn't paying much attention to, colored slightly. "What are you girls talking about exactly?" Eric interjected before Mike could say something stupid.

"Jessica's face." She said right as Jess interjected, "Edward Cullen."

Eric and Angela exchanged a dubious look, "What?" 

"Jess is being weird." Bella states, taking a bite out of her apple sullenly.

Her friend shot her an incredulous look, " _I'm_ the one being weird?"

"Most of the time." Angela quipped, trying to defuse the situation just in case it turned to an argument. At Angela's response Jessica pouted, making Mike snort and Eric release an ugly sounding chortle.

"Seriously though," Jessica said, "Do you like him, like, _like_ _like_?"

"What a way with words you have, Stanley." Bella mumbled.

"As much as I'm loving the rapport you two have," interjected Angela, "What are you two talking about?"

Bella shrugged, frankly, she was as clueless as everyone else.

"Ugh--" Jessica threw her head back, "--I'm trying to find out if my ship is gonna sink or not Ang, _please_ don't interrupt my interrogation."

"What do boats have to do with this?" Mike asked.

" _Silence!_ " Hissed the curly haired girl. "Now," She started, perfectly diplomatic, "Do you have a crush on Edward Cullen?"

Bella choked on her apple. "What?" Her voice was surprisingly controlled for someone who nearly died on a piece of fruit. "But he's such a nerd." She said in lieu of explanation.

Across the cafeteria, booming laughter.

Jessica, not taking her eyes off of Bella's, nodded once satisfied. "Good."

"Good?" Angela questioned. "I thought you wanted Edward and Bella to get together?"

Jess snorted, "Are you joking? _Please_ tell me your joking right now."

"I'm... not?"

Bella flinches at the sound of her friend's loud laughter. She exchanged a slightly concerned look with Angela across the table, and watched silently as Jessica Stanley _absolutely_ lost her shit.

"Does anybody actually know what's going on?" Eric whispered, glancing at Jessica while she hiccuped and clapped her hands together

"Dude--" Jess wipes a tear from her eye, "--Bella obviously has a crush on a very blonde, _very_ hot-" She paused for dramatic effect, "-- _Rosalie Hale._ "

Bella once again starts to choke on her apple. It took Eric hitting her on her back to actually start to breathe again.

_What the fuck?_

"What-" She coughs, "mother _fucking_ -!" She can't quite stop coughing.

She may have to talk to Jessica about discretion, and also tell Charlie about her sexuality.

 _(Later, at the Swan household: "Hey you know something we have in common?" Bella asks from across the dinner table._ _Charlie barely looks up, cutting into his steak and potatoes. "We both like girls?")_

 

\---

 

"If my dad wasn't the chief of police I'd actually punch him in the face." Bella says to Edward in biology. (She'd convinced Mr. Banner to change their seats again, it was strange how much sway she seemed to have with the man.)

"Okay," Edward says, "So you'd still punch him in the face if he _wasn't_ , the chief of police?"

Bella stares dead set into his eyes, "I assumed that was a given."

The bronze headed boy failed to stop his giggle. "You're funny. I think you and my sister would get along."

Her heart stilled, "The tiny one? Or the other one?"

Edward's lopsided smile would have been heart stopping if she was attracted to him, "Rosalie may take offence to being called _'the other one'_."

Bella didn't falter, "Oops. I feel so bad."

"If you spoke anything other than monotonous, I think that apology would actually work."

 

\---

 

"I don't take kindly to being called, 'other' I advise you rectify your mistake." Rosalie says, molten gold shimmering with something akin to rage.

Bella, not one to be intimidated, continued drinking from her chocolate milk-- the straw making slightly annoying sucking sounds. The blonde's eye twitched, and the ghost of a smile tainted the lips of the girl in front of her, before disappearing entirely. A soft sigh escaped Bella's mouth, the one day she decided to sit outside for lunch, _this_ happens.

"Oops. I feel so bad." Damn, she couldn't quite get the monotone out of her voice.

Rosalie raises one golden eyebrow, and examines Bella with the most scrutinizing gaze in the world.

Bella twitches, pursing her lips, and then takes a bite out of her red apple. The second the fruit leaves her mouth it's gone, in the perfectly manicured hand of Rosalie Hale, and then in the nearby trash can.

She stares.  _What the fuck?_

"What the fuck?" She whispers, and then again, "What the _fuck_?" 

Rosalie turns to leave, her hair whipping behind her making Bella catch a whiff of vanilla and motor oil. "Oh," She turns around shooting her an unimpressed look, "Get that truck of yours fixed, or better yet scrapped, it's an abomination." With that, she's gone.

And all Bella can say and think is, " _What the fuck?!_ "

~~Bella totally doesn't watch her hips sway when she walks away.~~

 

 ---

 

"Your sister is a scary lady," Bella rushes to tell Edward in the library, "But also like, a scary hot scary lady? The point is she's very nice looking when she's scaring the crap out of people, and possibly small animals."

He raises an eyebrow, "I take it she's visited you?"

" _No,_  I just watched her brutally destroy a grown man with a single look." 

"She does that sometimes." Edward said thoughtfully.

"I was being sarcastic, also--" Bella says, "--she's really done that before?"

Edward nodded.

"Fuck, she just _had_  to go and dis my truck." She mumbled.

"What does your mediocre vehicle have to do with this?"

Bella stares at him, kind of wanting to strangle his weirdly perfect neck. "I'd be proposing to her right now if she hadn't called my truck an abomination."

Edward suddenly looks very tired.

 

\---

 

"I told you to get your truck fixed." Rosalie Hale is the first thing that greets her on her way out the driver side door.

Bella frowned, she had gotten her very _awesome_ truck fixed thank you very much, not that Rosalie needed to know that. She huffed, taking her eyes off of her stupidly beautiful face and towards her beat up shoes. (For some reason or another looking at someone like Rosalie Hale felt wrong for someone like Bella Swan.)

"Well?" Rosalie says, growing impatient.

Bella, a little flustered at the sudden ambush, splutters a little. "It's--" She looks for something to say, "--It's really none of your business."

_Good job Bella piss off the one person who looks like she can kill you with a single raised eyebrow._

Rosalie sniffs her nose, and then recoils suddenly-- glaring at Bella's truck like it's committed every misdeed in the world. (If she was not so attached to her truck she may have just destroyed it to appease the blonde teenager.) "Who exactly did you get it fixed by?" She asks.

"As much as I'd love to watch you glower at my very _awesome truck_ \--" she had to throw in how cool her car was, "--and trust me I can watch you glare at something all day, I kind of have to get to class."

Rosalie Hale doesn't look like the person to get denied, so Bella decided that she should be the one that puts a stop to what the blonde girl wants (whatever that may be) just this once.

Surprisingly, the other girl smiles.

That's how it starts between them, Rosalie asking for useless impossible things and Bella denying her access to them.

 

\---

 

What happens next is unexpected, impossible-- extraordinary.

She doesn't thinks she remembers it correctly, doesn't think what she had seen could have been anything but impossible-- anything but a glitch in the system of her brain. Bella was standing there, she knows that-- knows that she was standing and staring and crying at the sight of the chains on her tires. She felt like someone had reached into her rib-cage and clenched her heart between their fist until the organ was mush and just oozing blood and gore because there were _chains_ on her _tires_ \--

~~She hadn't been the one to put them there.~~

Everything afterward happened so very fast.

Bella hears the screech, the sound of rubber tires on ice and pavement-- she only has time to spin around, to face her inevitable demise, (a van, seriously?) she can't even close her eyes.

They say if you want to find a man's most valuable possessions set his house on fire, and see where he looks first.

Inadvertently, Bella's eyes flick to that shady corner in the parking lot, the only place with a bench nearby and a huge tree planted in the grass-- where the Cullen family stand with equal looks of something like horror.

She meets Rosalie's eyes, and her golden eyes flash a different color-- and then she is there, holding Bella in her rigid bone chilling arms and turning her so that _Rosalie_ is the one who bares the impact. Bella can't even think to wonder how she managed to get over to where she was standing, all she can think is _Rosalie_ is getting _hit_ by a huge van-- _Rosalie_ is getting _hit_ with a huge van _instead_ of her.

Bella remembers her mouth opening to protest-- surely _Rosalie_ didn't deserve to be run over, she should be able to do _something_ \--

There's a yank in her gut, a rip in her mind, and the van barely brushes Rosalie's side. 

She still hears the sound of metal crumpling under some invisible force, and sees a perfectly round dent in Tyler Crowley's van.

Bella couldn't have done that, she remembers feeling pain and hurt but she thinks she'd remember stopping a van with her mind-- so it _had_ to be Rosalie, _had_ to have been.

Something deep inside of her knows that she is wrong.

"Miss Swan?" 

Bella blinks, moving her from the bright hospital walls to the doctor in front of her. He's handsome, the most handsome man she's ever seen-- but all she can think about is Rosalie, the girl who quite possibly saved her life. 

"Y-yes?" 

The man smiles, but something about it makes her hairs stand on end. She reads his name tag, _Carlisle Cullen._

"I asked if you had any pain near your head? My daughter tells me you had a pretty rough fall."

"Your daughter?" Bella mumbled.

"Rosalie." He says.

She nodded numbly, "You have the same eyes."

His pleasant smile goes tight.

Bella's father is quick to notice her discomfort.

"Dad?" Her voice is wobbly as the exit the hospital. "Did you put those chains on my truck for me?" She knows the answer already, but some small primal part of her needs him to say it outloud.

Charlie Swan looks momentarily startled. "U-uh yeah Bells-- it was pretty cold today, all the roads froze, it was important I do that for you. Some _people_ \--" He glares in the way of Tyler Crowley, who had a broken arm and lots of cuts and bruises, "--have yet to learn that, I swear I'll be taking away his driver's license for-"

She cuts him off by surging forward and throwing her arms around his middle. Her father flushes, and awkwardly pats her back and head, but Bella doesn't notice-- she's far too busy crying into his shoulder, sobbing ' _thank you'_  over and over again into the cold material of his jacket.

 

\---

 

"Hi!"

Bella rubs at her face tiredly. It was Sunday, didn't people get the memo that it was a day of absolutely no disturbance? 

She opens up her door, and it first doesn't see anything but an unfamiliar yellow porsche parked in front of her house.

She hears somebody mumble, "I can't believe I have to say this," and then, "down here!"

Bella blinks, tilted her head down, and opened her mouth in surprise. "Oh." She rubs at her face again, straightening her oversized sleep shirt a little, "How can I help you, Edward's tiny sister?"

"Yes hello!" The girl says, "I'm Alice, Edward told me he needed you for something? Texted you about an hour ago?"

"What?" Bella frowns, pulling out her phone and thumbing through her messages. "Holy shit--"

Bella scrambled backwards, grabbing her keys and stuffing her feet into her vans. She surged forward, closing the door and taking Alice by the hand. "Take me to your brother, tiny human."

Alice, delighted to be bonding with Bella but was more than disappointed in her outfit of choice (cotton sweatpants, an oversized sleep shirt, and a pullover that said 'Holden Caulfield thinks you're a phony') happily led her to the yellow porsche.

"That's, um, a very nice color-- er, very... joyful."

"Oh thank you! Yellow happens to be one of my favorite colors--" She eyed Bella's attire curiously, "--is your favorite color blue?"

Bella slipped into the car hurriedly, "No, more of violet person myself-- or you know that color that's so blue it's practically purple?" She rambled, not necessarily paying much attention, "Red's nice too, the color of Mars, which happens to be one of my favorite planets, just behind Venus-- Are you supposed to be going this fast?"

Alice, listening to Bella attentively laughed a little, "Honestly? Probably not, but you'll find everyone in my family likes to go fast."

"Seems like a weird thing to admit to me, the daughter of the chief of police."

Alice grinned, shooting her a mischievous look from the corner of her eye, "I have a feeling you won't tell."

 

\---

 

"I need you to court my other sister." Edward says from his position on the couch, Bella had swaddled him with as much blankets as she could find, and after he stopped looking sadly into the distance, he decides to drop that massive bomb on her.

"What now?" She took a moment to stop admiring the Cullen's living room to simply stare at the teenage boy. 

"Rosalie--" He looks up at her, "--I think she likes you, and... and you _like_ her, _right_? You care for her?"

 _Dude,_ she thought,  _I'm pretty sure I stopped a car with my mind even though she probably has like superhuman strength because I was afraid she might be sore in the morning._

She, of course, did not say that, instead she mumbled-- "Yes."

Edward sniffles, "Good."

He called out for Alice and someone named 'Emmett.'

Quicker than humanly possible both of his siblings appeared in the living room. "Hello!" Alice cheerfully greeted.

"Sup." Emmett nodded, "Heard a lot about you Bella, more specifically that you called Edward a nerd, which I can personally relate with and appreciate."

"Thanks--"

"I also heard, that you've decided to hook up with Rosalie-- which by the way, _hot--_  and I'm here for that." Emmett said.

Bella nearly teared up, "You're like the frat brother I never wanted but now _have_ for some reason-- I'm _so_ down for that, dude."

Emmett nodded, voice going rough, " _Bro_ \--"

" _Okay_!" Alice said, glaring at Emmett, "If your trying to make me jealous of your relationship with our future sister-- you've succeeded."

" _Wha_ \--"

"That being said," Edward interrupted Bella's confused noises, "I think we should, you know."

" _I_ don't know--"

"But that would be breaking the..." Alice leaned in close, ignoring Bella's protests, "You know."

Alice and Edward stared at each other for a few seconds, Emmett watching with annoyed eyes.

"Hey bro?" The big teenager asked.

"Hey dude?"

"Want to go play video games?"

That was how Rosalie, Jasper, and their parents found them, Bella and Emmett yelling at the TV screen while Alice and Edward silently debated with each other.

 

\---

 

Mrs. Cullen offered to make Bella _food_. Such a simple thing, but she nearly started crying. She wasn't even hungry, but she'd eat anything this woman decided to make. "You don't have to ma'am."

"Bella's probably not hungry Esme." Edward said as a matter of fact.

"Oh." The look on her perfect face was heart crushing. "Perhaps next time then Bella?"

"What no-- I mean yes I am, I'm starving--  _shut up Edward._ " She shot a glare in his direction, "She's offering to make me food, that I enjoy, which I hunger for-- Don't ruin it."

Emmett's laughter boomed from his place on the kitchen counter, "Yeah _shut_ _up_ Edward!"

" _Emmett_ _Cullen_!"

"But _mom_ \-- Bella said it first." Emmett protested. 

Suddenly sheepish, Bella apologized, only to receive a gentle dismissal and a plate of spaghetti.

Later, when up in Edward's room, "Your mom is awesome."

He, who was flopped on a couch (his room had no bed, weirdly) and swaddled in the blankets Bella had got for him, tilted his head. "You think?"

"Well-- I mean she _cooks_." Bella said through a mouthful of spaghetti.

Edward humms, flipping through his stacks and stacks of cds. He looks oddly adorable like that, covered from head to toe in blankets and scrunching his nose up when he finds something he likes. "Most moms do that I think, but she'll be happy to hear that you enjoyed her food."

"Y-yeah." Bella feels like she's caught in something then, slathered in honey and too slow to move. "Still."

She pretends not to notice the way Edward's head snaps up, and shoves a forkful of noodles into her mouth.

 

\---

 

"Do you do this often?" She asks Rosalie one day, watching as she fixes up one of the families cars. She had been walking up the driveway, only to find that the garage door was wide open, something strange considering that no matter who is in their it's never open when Bella is around. She had been about to walk away, when she noticed a pair of two perfect legs under a cherry red BMW.

Rosalie does not dignify her question with a response, to her question. "Edward's in his room sulking."

She frowns. "I'm not here to see Edward." As a matter of fact, she's actually there to compare food recipes with Esme, but she's not going to tell a pretty girl something as nerdy as ' _oh I'm here to geek out over your mom's food, also you're hot so that's an added bonus_.' So she says instead, "How was your day?"

It's at this moment, that Bella wants to die, as she realizes how exactly that question sounded.

The blonde girl paused for a second, and Bella notices the hesitation in the way she moves-- slowly sliding out from under the car and shooting her an unimpressed look. 

"Right." Bella says, "I'll leave you alone now." If Rosalie didn't want to talk to her, she wasn't about to force her.

 

\---

 

She's hanging out with Jacob Black when it hits in her in the face, quite literally. 

"My dad told me to throw this at your face." He says in lieu of explanation.

 _Oh_. She realizes when she reads the book later in her bedroom. _That's why she's so pretty._

In retrospect, it all kind of makes sense. All of them had perfect faces, perfect lives, perfect... _everything_. How does Bella fit in their little scheme? What on Earth do they want from her? And they drink blood? Drink actual blood and live _forever_ \--

_Fuck._

They're friends, they are _friends_.

Mrs. Cullen makes her food, and Edward makes her music, and Alice makes her smile, and Emmet makes her play video games, and she isn't that close to Jasper but he seems cool and treats Alice really good, and _Rosalie_ \--

She's Rosalie.

Talking to one of the Cullens to break the news that she knows wasn't a decision to be made lightly. What could she possibly say? How would she bring it up? Blah blah blah _blah_ \-- a ton of other questions she doesn't have the answer to, or the means to find a solution for. It takes a week before she finally decides to do something about what she's learned, a week of talking to them and introducing them to her favorite things and pining after Rosalie.

"So--" She's talking to Alice, because she has a feeling that the tiny girl will accept what she has to say the best, "--ever seen Dracula?"

The smaller girl groans. "That's what you're going with? A million and a half possible openers and you go for 'ever seen  _Dracula_?'"

Bella shrugs, because what else can she do?

"I mean," She watches her smile, "have you watched the movie, read the book?"

Alice smiles, "Edward has."

"Of _course_ he has." She mumbled.

Alice raises an eyebrow, "And so has Rosalie." 

"Tell me _more_."

 

\---

 

Being ignored by someone you care for is never particularly fun. Bella is sad to have to say she knows from experience. Rosalie had never been exactly a present force in her life or anything, but she was always near.

When she was playing video games with Emmett, Rosalie was often on reading a magazine on the Cullen's recliner, when she was debating books and music upstairs with Edward, the door to her room was open so when Bella happened to glance upward the blonde could be found in bed on her laptop, whenever she was cooking with Esme, Rosalie was complaining about the smell of food in the house, whenever Alice insisted on dress up and Bella couldn't find it in herself to utter the word 'no', she was lounging in the tiny girl's room to make sure that Bella didn't die of exhaustion-- _Hell_ , even when Bella struck up the occasional conversation with Jasper or Carlisle she was only ten feet away.

But with the realization that Bella knew of their nature, Rosalie was _gone_ \-- always in the garage or away, her door never once opening.

Bella had always known that the crush on the blonde would be fruitless, but it did hurt to realize that she didn't even want to _look_ at her.

She decided to make her trips to the Cullen household rare, only once or twice on the odd weekend or so, and through herself into her books and human friends.

 

\---

 

"If you keep sulking, I'll have to give you a hoodie and call you Edward." Alice said, thumbing absentmindedly through a stack of clothes she insisted Bella try on.

She scoffed, "I'm not _sulking_ , who told you I'm sulking-- a mood ring? You should throw it out, ' _cause_ I'm totally not sulking, I'm actually really _really_ cool right now."

Alice turned slowly, looking at her expectantly. "I stand corrected, I don't have to give you a hoodie, _Edward_."

_"I'm not sulking."_

"Whatever you say, _Edward_." Alice called her _Edward_ for the rest of the day.

 

\---

 

"You know you could try just a _little_ bit harder." Emmett says, they're playing a game that involves lots of guns and lots of zombies, "She won't crucify you for taking an interest in her." 

Bella huffs, fighting the urge to throw the playstation controller at his head. It's one of the rare days she actually spends time at the Cullen household, she doesn't want to sour it with senseless violence. (Besides, it wouldn't be that satisfying, it wouldn't hurt him.) "I don't know what you're talking about, _tiny_."

"Ouch." He laughs, "You wound me bro." He flexes his biceps a little, "You also hurt these babies--" Emmett paused the game, instead lifting his arms to show of his muscles. "Hush now, she didn't mean it babe."

If she can roll her eyes any harder than she had just done, she fears for the state of her vision. "Let's not talk about this." Bella says.

"She's in the garage listening to the conversation anyway, why not head over, talk-- hang out?" Emmett recommends, suddenly serious, turning off the playstation and tucking himself in next to her. "It can't hurt to try."

"Let's not talk about this." She says instead of answering.

" _Bella_ \--" He says, chastising, "--It's never gonna get better if you don't try."

She ground her teeth. "Let's _not_ talk about this."

"You know," he starts, "maybe about a decade ago I went to college and majored in psychology, I knew nothing would come out of it-- learning something I could never actually use to help people, a doctorate in mind healing, I called it."

Bella stills, "Where are you going with this?"

He turns to her, looks her right in the eye, and says, "I know an abused child when I see one."

Bella doesn't outwardly respond, doesn't kick him or trash the place or stomp out in a huff. Instead, she asks, "What, _exactly_ , do you mean by that?"

Alice is in the room suddenly, and Edward follows, making Bella wonder if this conversation may go horribly wrong.

"Don't make me list everything." Emmett pleads, suddenly apologetic, like he wants say sorry for telling her this.

She breathes in and out, fighting the urge to lash out. "Charlie never,  _ever_ , hit me."

"I never mentioned your father."

Anger. _Red_ \-- she clenches her fists, her knuckles go white. " _Neither_ did Renee."

"It doesn't have to be physical to be abuse." Edward murmurs.

Had someone lit a fire directly under Bella's feet she would not have noticed. "Why are we talking about this?" She felt a little hysterical, and it honestly showed. "Why do we have to talk at all?"

"Well--" Alice says, "--you're going to have to talk about one of your problems today, why haven't you been over here as much as before?"

" _Stop_ _it_."

She barely notices Jasper appear at his wife's side. "I recommend you stop honey, her emotional chart is all over the place." 

"Can't stop won't stop." Alice's voice was uncharacteristically serious.

Bella stood, and headed for the door. 

 

\---

 

Deciding to avoid the Cullen family was one of those things that was harder said than done. In practice, it was easy, it was mind blowingly simple. All she had to do was sit with her human friends all the time, head down to La Push, let Jacob sit inside her car or give her bro hugs, lock her window and tell her dad she hadn't been feeling that well lately.

But late at night, when she thought about it, when she planned how her day would go-- knowing Alice would see her decisions and know that everything she'd done to get away from her family was on _purpose_ \-- pain, unfiltered and all-knowing.

That hurt that trimmed her features late at night, made all those little decisions easier.

 

\---

 

_**the ally way  
** _

_do you hate us?_

_it would be easier to do that i think_

_are you going to respond?????_

_i need my best friend!!!!!_

_i'm sorry_

_you know your own limits i should have respected that_

 

_**(1) broody boi** _

_Bella_

_Please respond_

_Or even decide to look at us, so alice knows you've been reading these_

_We truly did not mean to hurt you_

_I am so very sorry_

 

**_my favorite dude-bro_ **

_hey-o bells_

_u still owe me like ten dollars_

_also im surrey_

_*sorry_

_if it makes it any better we all miss you_

_brooooo_

_respooooooooond_

_i will spam u_

 

_**jasper the cowboy-boi** _

_am i really called 'japer the cowboy-boi' in your phone?_

_i'll take your silence as a yes_

_we don't know each other that well, but i sympathize with what you are feeling_

_ma'am?_

_alice told me calling you that made you uncomfortable, i apologize_

 

_**mama cullen** _

_the children told me what happened, i will be punishing them appropriately_

_i would never force you to talk about something, and i hope you believe this_

_i love you, darling girl_

 

**_dr mcdreamy_ **

_Hello Miss Swan! Terribly sorry for all the grief my children have caused you, if you never need anything do not hesitate to call._

_Believe it or not, we all have grown quite fond of you._

_Alice told me to tell you Rosalie is quite-- er, 'smad'_

 

_**unknown** _

_Bella._

 

\---

 

"How dare you?" Bella says as the door to the Cullen household opens. "How _dare_ you?"

Alice looked properly chastised. "It was the only way to get you to talk to us, I checked--"

The look on Bella's face is heartstopping, it's really too bad nobody inside the house she just entered has working hearts. "You put too much stock in those abilities of yours, Honestly--" She walks past Alice into the vampire's house, "--did you even notice that I was on the path of forgiveness? Or did you peek into the future and--" She cut herself off. 

"Give me a hug you jerk."

Alice was quick to jump into Bella's arms. "I'm sorry." Her musical voice was muffled.

Her arms shook, "It's okay, It's _okay_ \--" And in that moment, it really was.

 

\---

 

She found herself cornering the blonde vampire in the school library. "Smad?" Bella asks, her smile somehow light and heavy at the same time. "You're _smad_ now?"

Rosalie looked at her, really _looked_ \-- "What a way with words you have, Miss Swan."

"The opposite can be argued in your case, I believe, Miss Hale." Bella murmured. "In any case, I do have a question that I hope you can answer for me."

"Oh?" The vampire raised a perfect eyebrow, "And what, pray tell, is that?"

The brunette smiled, a gentle soft sort of smile. "Do you dislike me?"

Rosalie's recoil was something for the record books.

" _Ah_." Bella nodded, understanding, "Okay." 

When she moved to walk away, a gentle tug on her wrist turned her towards the blonde. "Wait--" Her red mouth formed around the word, moving in such a way that made Bella's heart speed up. " _Wait_ \--" Rosalie's golden eyes darkened to amber, and she found herself wondering _why_ \-- The vampire's pale fingers, painted the color of pomegranates, were loose around the fragility of Bella's wrist. Rosalie was chilly, the cold was the reason that Bella had goosebumps, nothing else-- or that's what she told herself.

"Please," Rosalie whispered against her, " _Please_ \-- _wait_."

Bella can only find herself agreeing with the other girl so close to her, breathing in the same air as her-- Can only agree to be patient, despite the fact that she doesn't know what, _exactly_ , she's waiting for.

 

\---

 

It takes a while before she gets her answer, takes a lot of hellos and bad jokes and hanging around the Cullen household. Bella finds that it's worth it, to realize that Rosalie had felt the same, to feel their mouths slotted together, Bella smearing Rosalie's immaculate lipstick.

Rosalie Hale--

Bella can't breathe when she's around, and as strange as it is, Rosalie feels the vampire equivalent of not breathing whenever _she's_ around.

That simple thing is what makes all the weird supernatural shit worth it.

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed it, remember to comment :)


End file.
